Financial Hack

Saturday proved to be a significant hiccup to our finances.

The mail box brought some very ‘special’ gifts.

1.) We received a lovely note on friendly canary yellow paper that notified us about our new mortgage payment… $150 higher.

Our city ‘reassessed’ the value of our house. I’m thinking they ran the comps in Beverly Hills, New York City, and Laguna Beach. This diluted thinking appraised our house at $150,000 more than I could wish to sell it for on the coldest day in hell.

Um… Have they not been watching the news??!? I’d be lucky to get five bucks for this pile of bricks!

Where are we planning to get an extra $150 a month?

Oh, you mean other than selling my mortgaged soul to the devil?

Crud. I think I did that anyway.

We’re cutting back on the amount we’ve been stashing toward savings, reducing our ever shrinking food budget, reducing our laundry and clothing budgets (‘clean’ is overrated these days anyway), and we are forced to cut back on some of the extra money we’ve been paying on my car loan.

I can’t tell you how disappointed I am about this setback. I’d feel much better if the extra $150 was going to my mortgage but it’s likely going to replace a light bulb on a street I’ll never visit – or replace another $1,500 toilet seat in city hall.

2.) Ding bat here completely neglected to pay her student loan payment. The last time I paid a bill late was in 1997… and it was to my mother.

I DON’T PAY LATE.

EVER.

But thanks to the constant moving, constant working, and my recent lack of organization, I missed the payment. I received a nasty letter from my student loan company (heaven forbid they notice my last 5 years of perfect payments) demanding immediate payment.

I cried for an hour then sent triple the payment with a long apology letter.

Gee. Cause I’ve got that kind of cash.

Not.

Hmm. Scavenging the food budget again? Yes.

3.) We received our winter electric bill.

I’m a Californian. I have thin blood. When the temps reach a frigid 72 degrees, I run the furnace.

Our bill doubled.

Where am I going to dig up the additional $83 needed to keep the lights on? The food budget of course!

We now have 52 cents to last 2 weeks.

Gotta love setbacks – and Ramen apparently.

I received an offer to work weekends as a ‘car model’ again. I would have said no but setbacks 1, 2, and 3 demand cold hard cash.

Guess I’ve got to lay off the Twinkies and pull out the bottle of fake tanner.

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